Fama

La fama es un amplificador. No cambia lo que eres: solo lo hace más grande. La fama puede tener sus beneficios y sus desventajas. En ambos casos se debe tener en cuenta la responsabilidad: en los beneficios, para no llegar a herir a otros; en las desventajas, para no herirte principalmente a ti mismo.

La fama trae la responsabilidad de ser un ejemplo. Cada persona ya lo es para otras, quiéranlo o no. Con la fama esto se incrementa y puede desbordarte —más aún si eres una persona inmadura, si careces de principios y valores que te sirvan de guía, o si no tienes un propósito claro—.

La fama conlleva también la responsabilidad de ser una voz que defienda las causas justas, porque tu luz influye mucho más en los demás.

Puedes tratar de alejarte de la fama, y está bien. Así como está bien abrazarla y sobrellevarla mientras creces. Que esté bien equivocarse no debe convertirse en justificación para no esforzarse en evitarlo.

La fama es una herramienta, un amplificador. Qué vas a amplificar es cosa tuya. Si será algo bueno o malo es tu decisión —como en cada acción de la vida—. No es algo con lo que creerse superior a los demás, ni con lo que empequeñecerse por verlo como algo grandioso. Es algo pasajero, como la vida misma en este gran universo.

Face

People try to change their faces, but the results can be perceived very differently. Some changes come across as comic or unnatural — and some people look for exactly that, whilst others perhaps do not intend it. I prefer the natural look: improvements that leave the face appearing as though nothing artificial was done. Whether it is make-up, surgery, injectables, or other techniques I am not familiar with, the ideal for everyday style is to wear it and not appear to be wearing anything at all. Seeing a face that is obviously made up is one thing; wearing make-up that seems invisible — that is something else entirely.

I am not sure whether make-up is strictly necessary on television due to lighting or other factors. Perhaps not, and it has simply become the norm even when it is not strictly needed.

We should also bear in mind that faces differ due to age, ethnicity, diet, and environment. In recent decades we see faces that look younger compared with photographs of people of the same age from fifty or more years ago. Beyond genetics, we see someone of sixty who looks forty, or someone of fifty who looks thirty or forty.

I think we can improve our appearance through knowledge of nutrition, exercise, and certain products — but the goal should be to maintain a natural look rather than a comic one. The best improvement, in a face or anywhere else, is the one that leaves no trace of itself — only the result. And the best things a face can have are a genuine smile and shining eyes.

Quarrel

Sometimes we avoid quarrels, and sometimes — perhaps — we should experience them. I think they are more likely to happen if you grow up in an immature environment. I am not used to them myself. I have seen them treated as normal behaviour in some families. And it is possible that some would say they are fine — the way insulting rivals in stadiums is considered normal, or the way some friends greet each other with insults. But are those really quarrels? They may appear that way because of the intensity, but I understand a real quarrel as something different: a genuine lack of manners and restraint — being truly angry, heated, because you have been suppressing emotions.

Like a glass of water filled drop by drop until it overflows — the drop that spills the glass is not just a drop. It is the only one you see, but it is there because of all the ones contained before it. That is the analogy for when someone says something cruel or impolite and claims it was the heat of the moment: it is because there is more of that inside. If you see hatred or racism surface, there is more where it came from. Is that always the case? I do not know — but it may well be, and there are probably studies on it.

We should experience quarrels when we are exploring our limits — when we are growing up — because they help us know ourselves better. But not as something that happens every week or month.

Tell

Telling stories is how people shared knowledge, wisdom, and morals. Before writing, people only had stories to tell. And those stories could be different each time someone told them. Yes, people can memorise stories — but is it not better to transmit feelings and connect with your audience by adapting the story to them?

I always remember an exercise we did at school. Four classmates were chosen and taken out of the classroom. One of them read a short story aloud to those remaining inside, and then told it — not read it — to one of the classmates waiting outside, without the others hearing. That second classmate came in and told us the story: it was already slightly different. Then the second told it to the third, and so the process repeated. By the third retelling the story had changed noticeably, and by the time the fourth told it, it was completely different. This exercise helped us understand that stories can change — and distort — their original meaning with each retelling.

Psychologists call this the telephone effect — each retelling introduces small changes that compound into something unrecognisable. And that is one reason why stories like those in the Bible may contain inconsistencies or contradictions. Also because the way people communicated in ancient times was often more metaphorical or mystical. Should we take those stories literally? I would say no — and I would argue that we have been given the capacity to think and discern precisely so that we do not.

Roll

Many times we fall into a loop where we roll through the same thoughts again and again. We may change the stories, the scenarios, the context — but I think we stay in the same roll until we unroll it. And this roll is something we must process, something we must face without avoiding — we must look at it directly and understand it. It may mean taking a step forward in order to mature and gain wisdom.

It is possible, yes, to set it aside for a while — to think about other things, or to let our subconscious work on the solution whilst our conscious mind focuses on other activities, or simply rests. That can be important when we are stuck and cannot see a way out. But sooner or later we must always face it: everything unresolved will be with us for the rest of our lives. The answer is not to stop thinking about it, but to think about it differently.

And we carry many rolls through our lives. Some we unroll and resolve, and new ones can form. We must learn to manage how we respond — to avoid creating those harmful rolls that hold guilt and fear in place. We must work through our own first before trying to help others. Our experience can be valuable, but remember: not everyone is ready to deal with theirs. Some need a push; others need time. 

Peinado

Un peinado puede cambiar mucho el aspecto de una persona: el color, la forma, la textura. Un peinado puede ser una distinción cultural —como ocurre con las mujeres africanas o de origen africano en distintos países, que acostumbran a crear peinados elaborados y llenos de significado—. Incluso personas ajenas a esa cultura pueden sentirse atraídas y probar dichos peinados. A la gente le gustan otras culturas, y la comida, la vestimenta, los rituales o los peinados son formas de intercambio cultural, de apreciar lo que otros han construido.

Un peinado puede ser una marca de pertenencia a un grupo. Puede ser una protesta, un acto de rebeldía. Puede ser un acto de amor —una forma de decir sé que te gusta esto y lo hago por ti—. Puede ser para gustar a otros o simplemente para gustarse a uno mismo.

Los peinados se adaptan, los peinados cambian. Y en ese sentido pueden ser un reflejo del estado interno de la persona. Como los peinados, debemos aprender a no apegarnos —a entender que son pasajeros—, y podemos incluso disfrutar de que nuestro «peinado» sea la calvicie. Los hombres pueden jugar a crear distintos «peinados» con la barba. El peinado es una metáfora de la vida: no se trata de los recursos que tienes, sino de lo que haces con ellos. Y a veces, lo más elegante es abrazar lo que ya tienes.

Hen

I am not sure whether in English the expression is literally the hen that laid the golden eggs — but its short story teaches us to take care of the hen, to let it keep giving us golden eggs. If we slip into greed, we end up killing the hen to get the eggs she might have inside. And once she is dead, she can give us no more.

Perhaps that is the greatest problem of humankind: not following the Golden Rule — greed. Investors do not want to pay fair salaries; they want to extract more and more money in exchange for their money. They do not produce. They lend money and claim interest. They may try to justify this — and self-deceive — by arguing that they help society by funding companies. And some do try. But in general, are they trying to improve the lives of employees, or to satisfy investors? Where is the most money made? Is it not in war? Is it not in exploiting natural resources, avoiding due process, and paying no taxes? Is it not in granting mortgages where, if people cannot pay, they lose the house and still carry the debt? That is not helping people. It is exploiting them. It is not following the Golden Rule — unless you do not love your parents, your children, your brothers and sisters, yourself. You are exploiting the hen. And without people, you have no money.